My first entry...well, I said I'd let you in on the details so... I'll start with how I RESET my mindset regarding my training because thats where I'm at right now. The L.A. Marathon in March was the last bike tour we did. Since then my training and  mindset have become some what sporatic. Mind you I have continued to ride and workout only with less intensity and specifity. Don't get me wrong, a short hiatus from the grind is much needed and in fact a vital part of a successful program. However, my last few months have been a little more than a rest break. Between relocating to a new home, in a new town, and finding and loosing a love like I've never felt before, has splintered my focus. We all go through stages of clarity and utter confusion, it's just the duration in which we stay in those states. I have learned alot in these times and I find it invaluble to me and my growth as a man.

Soooo... what do I do to find my center and put the locomotive train named "Aaron" back on the tracks? First, I surround myself with people who truly love me, unconditionally. Second, I remove myself from everyone and everything and meditate, somewhere quiet, (the desert, the beach, a hill top, or a quiet room) this allows me to settle my thoughts, give thanks and focus on pure energy and love...the love shared by my family and friends. Third,  and this is a little drastic, I shave my head! I remove vanity from my equation. There are many insecurities that accompany a disabilty and for me when I strip myself of appearance and ego I am left with only me. Naked and aware I refocus on my objective. I call this my RESET! I have used versions of this technique over the years on my journey and have found tremendous benefits and knowledge in the process. I thrive on intensity, but there is a drawback to this level of energy. It is not sustainable over time, eventually you burnout. Hence my ever evolving quest of finding BALANCE - to maintain positive forward momentum in life for the greater good.

My journal entries hereafter will be a reflective perspective on me and my life of spinal cord injury. I hope you enjoy my thoughts and derive a sense of connectedness with me, because I'm connected to YOU.    Thanx

It's hot, smoggy, and I'm starting to feel the effects of beginning another training cycle. Delayed onset muscular soreness (fatigue) is setting in...in other words, I'm tired. I feel pretty good considering the catabolic state my body was in just a week ago. I primarily focused on my nutrition this week, making it my number one priority. Cardio came second with multiple bouts of cycling and elliptical training, flexibility was next because my body is so stiff right now I literally feel like the Tin man from the Wizard of oz...I need some oil man! Strength training was off the list for this week, I need to feed my body more before I start breaking down muscle. Mentally I am well, reflecting on some not so pleasant recent events I find myself gaining a sense of power and resolve. This further fuels my intensity, more like mental rocket fuel to help pedal legs that sometimes don't want to pedal. I look forward to the fireworks on the 4th, my friends want me to help them build the ultimate firework, but these days you could be sited for terrorist activity if you build something like that, we'll see. Enjoy the long weekend, Toots (mom) and I will be crankin out the miles on Pacific Coast Highway so I'll post a little something about my explosive weekend. Cheers!

No fireworks today, I felt like a dud on the bicycle. I attribute my performance to elevation. Yesterday Toots and I went scouting around our new neighborhood for cycling routes to train on. Our search led us high up into the San Gabriel and Tehachapi mountains, the Grapevine, (I-5). FYI: the original "Grapevine" was built in 1915 and was named by early Wagoner's who had to hack their way through thick patches of Cimarron grapevines that inhabited "La Canada de Las Uvas," Canyon of the Grapes. The old highway is still ridable (Ridge Route) and provides great scenery and awesome elevation challenges. The road we traversed today we nicknamed "Montana" because the wide open valley surrounded by mountain tops reminded us of "Big Sky" Montana. Today's ride marked the highest elevation we've trained at (3600 ft). We both felt a dramatic decline in power out put and ability to sustain high heart rates for prolong periods. Our ride was short but sweet, only lasting an hour we chose to cut it short for lack of knowing how my body would respond to a shortage of oxygen. We ended both feeling as though we rode twice as far as we did, so our decision of stopping early was validated. Tomorrow our night sky will be lit with the wonder of fire and light choreographed by our imaginations.be safe, have fun.I know I will.  ~AB

So while most of today's developed Wal-Mart world was in a backyard or park BBQing and tippen back cold ones, I was masochistically pushing plates of iron on machines built to build the body, that is until they closed the Gold's Gym at 2:00 pm. From there I thought why follow the masses to the red meat line on the holiday...lets have sushi instead! Shogun Sushi served up some killer red, white, and blue rolls for the occasion with a dab of green, (wasabi) the hot stuff! What's the 4th of July without fireworks? Come to find out the city of Valencia holds a pretty spectacular firework show every year. Toots and I cruised downtown to the plaza where thousands of families and smiling faces lined the streets sprawled out in lawn chairs and blankets creating small campsites. We scoped out the Ben&Jerry's ice cream shop and enjoyed America's favorite desert while oooing and aaawwing at the pyrotechnic show. This day of independence signifies for me how lucky I am (we are) that I can chase my dreams like the proverbial streak of fire across the sky, I blaze my trail, embracing all along the way. Thanks to those who have made it possible.

Throughout life we are influenced by many people, individuals who influence how we think, or how we communicate, what we wear, or what we aspire to be like. I have been in the presence of a man I am tremendously influenced by and not even known it. My friend Bob. Bob is an 82 year old man who suffered a stroke 4 years ago and has been working with Taylor Isaacs. I met Bob 3 years ago, and immediately felt as though I were apart of his family. He tells me stories of the desert and how he and his gigantic family would holiday out in the dunes with their buggies and motor homes. He talks about the San Fernando Valley and the way it was 50 years ago and how his construction company Swanson and Son's has helped develop the landscape. He's always cracking jokes in the gym, trying to get a laugh out of my serious demeanor... I laugh, partly at the joke, but mostly because he sounds like an old wheezy dog when he's laughing, it's great!  I admire and look up to Bob, because he is a man of value, a man of integrity. The way he speaks about his life, his work, and his family, the way he looks at his beautiful wife (Joy) and talks about her after 60 years of marriage. The courage and determination it takes for him to get up and give 100% in the gym everyday. I realized today while watching Bob pedal a recumbent bike from across the gym floor, how much I look forward to the silver years. I hope to look back over a long prosperous life of creation and influence and wheeze out some old jokes to get smile out of someone I love. Thanks Bob.

Not everyday is spent doing things I enjoy. Today I spent a few hours waiting in the doctor's office to have some tests done. I have spent what seems like thousands of hours in a doctor's office, or a hospital, it's not my favorite place to be. I was prepared to ride though; I had my bicycling shorts on under my jeans so that as soon as I finished with my appointment we could ride. We rode our old stomping grounds...Balboa Park. Balboa was the first place we tested our ability on the tandem bike. The 5 mile tree lined path circles Balboa Lake with sprawling grass hills littered with BBQ pits and picnic tables. It was nice to get out there and sweat away my doctors visit blues. Overall I feel pretty healthy, I am thankful my body is responding to this new training cycle. "Movement = Improvement" quote by Taylor Isaacs.

Coffee couldn't even get me out of bed this morning. I stumbled into the gym around 9:30 am with what seemed like only one eye open. Breaking a sweat took a little longer than usual. I finished my routine around 12:15 pm with much more energy. I received a call for lunch from my friends Jesse Billauer, of the (Life Rolls On) Foundation and Lindsey Short, his personal care taker. I stripped off my sweaty workout clothes right there in the middle of the gym parking lot and threw on some jeans and a tee-shirt and blazed down to Jesse's house in Marina Del Ray. We scarffed down some Island Big Wave burgers and relaxed at Jesse's beach side abode. Honestly, I fell asleep on Jesse's couch after plowing that burger. We were kicking back watching a little of the Tour De France when, zzzzzzz, I was out! I guess I need to get more sleep tonight. It was nice to spend quality time with quality people...The Hugh Hefner philosophy, which I've adopted and believe in strongly. So. do as Hugh does, choose quality friends, spend your time with them doing quality things and wear pajamas all day. Ha! teasing, the first part is true though and I find it to be a valuable guideline for longevity...

(Energy) - The capacity of a physical system to do work...the exertion of force. "A general definition of the term" this definition holds true when a Physical system Works! What about when it doesn't? Like say for instance, you take an athlete in the prime of his physical abilities and turn the physical switch off, a spinal cord injury. What happens to the energy the body was so used to using and producing? Well, I can tell of my own experience as an athlete, whose switch was abruptly shut off and friends who suffer from spinal cord injury. The body, a once well oiled machine, now lay like stone on pressed sheets. Depending on the level of injury, mine, cervical fracture 4-5-6 produces either a Quadriplegic, (me) affecting all four limbs, or Paraplegic, affecting lower extremities only. Whatever the injury, the body energy flow is not the same. The connection between the brain and body has been interrupted. Ex: Kink a garden hose when the water is flowing, what results; the strong steady flow of water at the end of the hose is diminished to a trickle. Case in point! The neuro muscular impulses from the brain to the muscular junction trickles or sometimes never arrive. So in my case the hose was kinked. My body lay still, but my mind, full of what I visualized as intense kinetic energy surged light through my quiet shell. From the very beginning I visualized this, colors of light filling my limbs. I never really studied anatomy but I could visualize my self from the inside out, every bone, muscle, and organ. I would breathe light into the deepest parts of my body with a now conscience awareness of my energy. Although it took months and years to translate this willed mental force into actual movement, my body was producing far more energy than it ever did as a high level athlete. You see, the amount of willed mental force is takes, for say, my friend Donovan ( C, 4 quadriplegic ) also a high level athlete, to crank an arm cycle ogometer with his arms for 10 minutes, would be equivalent to the mental force Lance Armstrong puts into his legs at the finish line sprint of a race. I use Lance Armstrong as an example because people can relate to his story and the huge effort put forth on his bike, shown through his face and his results. Now take that level of energy and effort and transfer it into tying your shoe. Hard to conceive I know. But that is what I'm talking about; channeling all the energy your body is used to producing as a whole, into a single simple physical task. It is our thought that, through consistent, dedicated, long-term exercise I will turn my neuro pathways into super neuro highways, further enhancing my physical synchronicity and performance. Mind, Body, and Spirit, understand these separately, be willing to exert maximum mental force and your awareness will be one.

Today was a day of rest for me. I slept in, watched the entire stage 8 of the Tour De France, cleaned my hot tub, and indulged on some New York style pizza. "Relax" is the word of the day. I sometimes have trouble resting in that state, allowing myself a full day of recovery. My body needs the rest but my mind won't always let me. Today though, was nice. I enjoyed an inspiring phone conversation with a young guy named Paul. Paul lives in Chicago and recently suffered a spinal cord injury. He and his mother Joanna are on a mission to overcome his adversity. Paul tells me he derives great inspiration from the work we are doing. I am honored to know this and after speaking with Paul this afternoon, I felt a sense of real pride knowing Paul and others like Paul are out there with the same spirit of determination to Rise Above and overcome rather than succumb to tragedy. I can only hope that through our endeavors to build the Aaron Baker Foundation, we bridge the gap between spinal cord Research and Rehabilitation, (ongoing therapeutic exercise) to provide everyone the opportunity to improve the quality of their life. Oh and yeah! The hot tub was RELAXING!

Whoa! What a day. I started off preparing for a business meeting we had planned for 12:00 noon in L.A., after the meeting I wanted to ride the coast because it was such a nice day. We had to scratch that idea since the meeting ran long, which was good, the traffic home was bad, that was not good. I then received a call from my buddy Brandon letting me know about the premiere party at Casablanca (his house) for he and his brother Brody's new show "The Princes of Malibu". I am a lucky guy; I was escorted to the show by the two most beautiful ladies around, Hollyn and my mom...minus my sister Arielle. The show was displayed on a huge 50 foot outdoor screen on the front lawn of Casablanca. The atmosphere was exciting because my buddies were about to become famous over night, kind of weird to see the crazy fun stuff we do all the time, on TV. Leaving Casablanca all I could think about was how amazing the contrast of individual realities this world holds. Brandon and Brody live very privileged lives, not by choice, but by circumstance, while other friends of mine struggle just to stay afloat. And then on a whole other scale, the rest of the world, poverty stricken, war torn countries, cannot even conceive of the life style I lead...and I survive on disability!  (for now). I feel extremely fortunate to have humble, honorable friends who love and respect me the way they do. Thanx boys...The show will be a hit!

Dreams...the majority of my most vivid dreams come in the early hours of the morning. Sometimes what I've dreamt will affect the way I start my day, sort of like waking up on the right or wrong side of the bed. I rarely dream of my disability. If I do, it's more like knowing something's wrong with me but doesn't stop me. Lately I've dreamt about riding in the Tour De France. In my dream I am riding in the Peleton, but I keep getting passed by riders. This is where I wake up disturbed, because I hate being passed! This motivates me for the day, to work harder to prevent being passed in reality. This competitive spirit can sometimes be defeating though. I do not think like I'm disabled, so when I am put face to face with my limitations either in the gym, on the bike, or even in a social environment I sometimes become frustrated. I diffuse my frustration by realizing that I'm my only competition, the only person I have to race is me. I place high expectations on myself and I do my best to live up to them. I like progression! Mental, physical, spiritual, progression! I am most satisfied when I live up to my own personal expectations and when I do that, I feel a sense of forward momentum. I find that satisfying myself mentally more than physically is by far the most important part of maintaining that forward momentum. Knowing at the end of the day I did my best, gave it my all, at whatever I've done. Whether it is training, riding, working, or spending time with someone, I like to lay my head down on my pillow at night feeling an overall sense of accomplishment, in my effort. I can only hope tonight yields pleasant dreams of a beautiful girl, sandy beaches, and fierce competition... 

I chose not to go to the Gold's Gym today because sometimes I need to be alone. Having a spinal cord injury strips most people of their independence. I have experienced this and to an extent still depend on others for certain things. This is very difficult for ones psyche. Having been a very independent young man, this obstacle is a hard one to overcome. You pretty much have to surrender completely to the daunting fact that, you can't help yourself and you depend on others for EVERYTHING! Today though, I lead a pretty independent life. I can bathe myself, dress myself, feed myself, and even drive my own car. All luxuries, most can't fathom not doing. And all, at one point, I could not do. So to feel independent I executed my routine in my garage, a place I have set up with equipment to gettr done!  I have my music, my bike set up on a stationary trainer, and tons of other stuff to work up a sweat. Alone! I usually train 5 days a week with Taylor Isaacs (clinical exercise physiologist) and am guided through very specific programs designed for me and my goals. I still sometimes feel an overwhelming sense of dependency on others to make my dreams a reality. I believe strongly in the 10 most powerful two letter words...IF IT IS TO BE IT IS UP TO ME!  However, a wise man must also understand that Together Each Achieves More (acronyms courtesy of Taylor Isaacs) and I would not be where I am today without the incredible selfless support of my mother Laquita, my father Dan, Taylor, and the rest of my loving support circle. I just seek balance and today, alone in my oven hot garage, I was totally independent, sweating out frustration, organizing thoughts, and rocking out to some seriously loud tunes. ;)

A sense of peace. Today I received the results of the tests my doctor checked me for last week. The results were great! I let out a huge sigh of relief as he read his findings. Over the past six years I have experienced a plethora of alarming physical ailments, which put me through the medical revolving door. Everything from a Syrinx in my spinal cord (fluid filled gap) to the narrowing of the superior mesenteric artery which causes me stomach problems. I have managed to stave off the majority of common secondary complications which typically follow an injury as severe as an SCI. I truly believe the reason for my health is my commitment to it. However, I do have a chronic condition and my body can only work so hard. The scariest part for me is not knowing! I am still trying to understand what my body is telling me. We all are born and over time as we grow, we learn about our bodies and what it tells us. Kinesthetics: the perception or sensing of the motion, weight, or position of the body as muscles, tendons and joints move. Our proprioception (what we feel through touch; hot-cold-pressure,etc) our balance (how we maintain it in this gravity filled environment) our pain perception (what hurts or is uncomfortable and to what degree)...basically tons of information our bodies tell us without our thinking about it. I am consciously learning all this for a second time. So when some kind of medical issue arises I become anxious because of not knowing what my body is trying to tell me. The past few days I have been trying to prepare myself for the worst, only because I know that anything can happen to anyone, at anytime. So today, when I was given the news, a lightness came over me and I felt extremely peaceful. After thanking the doctor for his courtesy, we left the office and went to Balboa park bike path because once again I had my bicycling shorts on under my jeans and was ready to ride. Toots and I enjoyed lunch under the shade of a tree, joined by some crazy geese that honked by the lake shore and I reflected on my uncertainty and smiled at how in the blink of an eye, dark turns to light.

92 degrees at 9:00 am. With the windows down we drove to the coast from Santa Clarita. It takes just about an hour with slight traffic. There's always traffic in southern California but PCH is our favorite ride and it's well worth the road rage. Already sweating as we cruised over the hill towards the coast we were met with a thick grey blanket of fog that seemed to swallow cars as we descended down Kanan road intersecting with PCH. The temperature dropped to a body tweaking 65 degrees. Toots and I were both dressed in our hot weather riding gear prepared for a sweat. When I began my pre ride stretch, my body began to twitch and sweat profusely; I became light headed and a little nauseous. The abrupt drop in temperature shocked my system and almost ruined our ride. We decided to carryout our plan of a 3+ hour ride in spite of my little episode. Our decision to ride was a good one because as soon as I began pedaling and raised my heart rate and core temperature my body felt great. The coast was spectacular, riding through the fog as it lifted; unveiling blue green water and sheer rock cliffs made us both shake our heads at how lucky we are to train on such a beautiful part of the California coast line. 32 miles is the distance logged for the day and sun burnt arms is the price we payed...ha-ha that rhymes! We forgot sun block because of the foggy start, so now I'm greased up with aloe vera gel to ease the burn, oh well, it was worth it! Next week we'll have more structure with our ride schedule pushing our endurance rides off till the weekend. For now though, I'll rest my achy legs, sooth my burnt skin and feed myself 5000 calories so I can do it all again....Dude, I should be a rapper or something, I swear I don't premeditate these rhymes!

I felt like sharing these two pieces of mind today because they draw a profound picture of my duel personality. I was once told by a self proclaimed mystical woman that I have the eyes of a risk taker. And for my entire life that statement has held true and continues to be true. I live a fine line between calculated risk and blind faith in my ability. Six years ago my physical risk taking landed me a broken neck, but also a wealth of wisdom. Today I risk the same, only with a more profound understanding of life and what's really important. I risk to live, open and free, I feel the rush of life in me with every uncertain step. And in the infinite moment between my steps, I acknowledge the one invisible force that allows this awareness...my breath. Writings below acquired by: Matters of the Spirit.

Risk

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams, before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken.
Because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
If you risk nothing and do nothing, you dull your spirit.
You may avoid suffering and sorrow, but you cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, and live.
Chained by your attitude, you are a slave.
You have forfeited your freedom.
Only if you risk are you free.

Leo Buscaglia

Life?

"What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset."

Last Words of Crowfoot
Blackfoot Warrior and Orator, 1890

Yesterday, Saturday, was much needed. Rest and recovery was on the menu. Again, proper nourishment and sleep was my main goal...until I began feeling the effects of cabin fever. I figured I'd cruise out and see some friends to balance out my day. I returned home last night later than I wanted, but had fun none the less. Today was focused around our bike ride. We chose to ride a road we scouted but have not ridden. "Demon Ridge" was the name given to the route today. I have not been that close to puking or passing out in a long time. I didn't know which I was going to do first, pass out or puke. Luckily I did neither, but I was definitely at my thresh hold. The ride wasn't long at all when compared to our usual training rides, it was the degree of difficulty of the climb and duration at which we spent at that intensity, I figuratively "hit the wall" I couldn't go any further. I am extremely proud at how we are performing, especially Toots! She was cranking those pedals as though possessed by the spirit of Armstrong himself, pure animal, GRRRRR! So it's off to bed for me, and hopefully I'm rested enough for a new week of fun, sweat and gears...

7-18-2005

Jim Maclaren, a true inspiration. A man who humbly bears the torch of human spirit. "To be alive is...a good thing." States Jim as he and Emmanuel Ofosu Yeboah accept the Arther Ashe Courage Award at the 2005 ESPY award ceremonies. I have known of Jim Maclaren and his Challenged Athletes Foundation and derive great inspiration from him. I think sharing our stories makes for a greater impact and gives greater resources to us all, that's why today I am writing about Jim and his story. Jim leads a life of immense adversity and rises above with glorious strength and poise, leading the way for the uncertain. We all posses the potential to overcome challenges placed in our path. I feel that through sharing individual triumphs it reflects like a mirror our own internal strength, to face these obstacles, what ever they may be. I encourage a long look at Jim's personal website for that reflection. I have not met Jim personally, I don't need to, I feel empowered through his words and his actions and even more so sharing Jim with you.

A morning of errands lead into an afternoon of icing and stretching. Over the last two days a faint ache in my right knee has slowly throbbed it's way to my full attention. I am very in tune with my body, but I have a tendency to ignore phantom pains because something with my body is always aching. My knee though, has felt this way in the past and I know now what to do in this situation. ICE...my pal,"Bag O Ice" and I, have been hanging out lately. Stretching and "NOT" riding are the prescription. Tomorrow Taylor will defacilitate the muscles around my knee and hopefully I'll be riding later this week. I'm excited to ride a new road I found this morning while I was out and about. Highway 126, connects the Santa Clarita valley to the Ventura County coastline. 50 miles one way. This road will provide long hours of seat time on the bike helping build our endurance capacity. For now though, I will soak my soul under a full moon in my hot tub, contemplating the complexities we create out of such simple things. Don't sweat the small stuff! 

Partnership...Sustainable harmony between two individuals. Is it possible for generations to come?  Is it as common today as say...50 years ago? In my opinion, No. Why? I feel a decay of moral fiber in today's society, mainly in my generation "Generation X" and forthcoming. The mass quantities of readily available elicit information, fed intravenously to our youth through media i.e.; TV, movies, internet, and video games has in my opinion desensitized today youth culture, (at least here in the U.S.). I write about this today because it has happened again. Another friend of mine is suffering the effects of emotional devastation. I know, relationships come and go and hearts are meant to be broken. That's life, right! Well, what happened to real love in a relationship? The kind with true honesty, integrity, and conviction. Where two can synergistically share each others company without the fears brought forth by an ever promiscuous society. Maybe I was born to late, or call me old fashion, but I hope to share with someone that connection and I trust I will. Because I have lived the other side, as a youth knee deep in my generations fabric mush... where my respect, morals, values and real awareness of consequence for my actions played second fiddle to my "I need it Now!" mentality. My real awakening came in the form of sheer catastrophe, "a train wreck" I call it, lying half dead in a hospital bed literally changed my life. This "Wreck" uncovered the fabric I was born with but became covered by my own desire to be socially likable. I am scared for my peers today because I see so many, marching head long with their unchanged destructive behaviors, suffering through major emotional trauma from unevolved emotional frauds. I want so much to trust and for the majority I do. It is my heart I guard with a battalion force of standards and earned admittance. I know where I stand with regards to the threads I'm made of, I just hope for my friends and peers alike, that they don't completely unravel before it's to late.

7-21-2005

Every time I see a hawk soaring in the sky I am comforted by my thoughts of a dear friend. Mitchell Xavier Sanchez, a spirit so bright all you can see now is his light. He unfortunately passed away a few years ago and left us all devastated by our physical loss. Though today, Mitch is with me more now than ever. He is a constant source of strength and encouragement for me. I often find myself talking to the wind or to a bird that fly's above me, smiling and sometime laughing at my memories. Today I talked to Mitch, I needed his guidance, when I feel a collapse in my mind, he is there steadfast in my heart and reassures my frustration. Yes, I am a bit frustrated today for reasons I don't really know. Sometimes the idle time wears on me and makes me a little crazy. I have been nursing my knee now for 4 days and I'm not being as productive as I like sooooo...that probably has something to do with my instability. Mitch is with me though, flying through my life with wings of wisdom, sharing his secret of patience. The picture of the hawk is a link to "Day of the Hawk" a memorial website created by Mitchell's father Fred, to celebrate Mitchell's life and to share Fred's poetry and profound books, "A Thousand Moments of Solitude"  and "The Master Illusionist, A New Brain Theory". Mitch, I miss wrestling with you, but our talks now are better than ever!

103 degrees was the temperature today on HWY 126, the new bicycling route I discovered earlier in the week. We were both excited to ride, but not so excited about the heat. My knee is feeling much better because of my diligence with icing and stretching. We spent 1:23 on the bike in the heat and decided that was enough suffering for the day. This time it was Toot's who almost passed out from the effort. In all a nice end to a week of mental torture...back on the bike and back to life, suffering and all.

Good friends, good times. A night out in Seal Beach was a nice way to spend a Saturday night. Sushi, sake, and good music was a recipe for excitement. Brian drove down from Las Vegas to stay with me for a few days so I figured I'd show him a good time. Lindsey is my favorite girl and she knows all the hot spots in Orange County, so we cruised down to her place. Sure enough she led us to an awesome Sushi restaurant with great food and a fun atmosphere. This place had soft cozy couches instead of chairs and a live DJ for music. It was right by the water so you know the fish is fresh! Any who...to make a long night short, Brian and I landed in our own beds at my house in the wee hours of the morning. zzzzzzzz!

A "Night by the Ocean" charity fundraising event hosted by "Life Rolls On" at the Casa Del Mar hotel in Santa Monica was   (Part 1) of the evenings festivities. A black tie affair had us all looking sharp, but far from the comfort of my gym clothes...my spandex cycling shorts are more comfortable than the gear I had on tonight. A few of my closest friends joined me as we schmoozed and mingled with socialites and stars alike. The event seemed like a class act, catering to some of Hollywood's A list. Donovan, Brian, and I..."The dirt bike kids" stuck by each others side and when we felt appropriate we slipped out the door. (Part two) of the evening began at "Ivy by the shore" a beautiful ocean front restaurant was the perfect place to go and dine in our fine attire. My Cinderella evening ended with a late night soak in my hot tub and my bed welcomed my heavy head.

This pie graph shows how my time is currently allotted. Cycling and training are obviously my main priorities right now, seeing as I seek to ride a tandem bicycle with my mother more than 3,000 mile next spring. I am a very spontaneous person however; when I set a specific goal my method for reaching that goal is structure. I thrive when my program is clicking, training, riding, resting and eating are my life...it's simple, everything else seems to just fall into place. Set backs, like my knee injury need to be taken into consideration and minor adjustments made. I am now on the mend from last weeks flux in my program and aim to ride a normal schedule this week. Set backs and gains are apart of the process and both are important for improvement. Maintaining a balanced mind set is sometimes easier said than done. I admit, when my program changes due to injury, illness, fatigue, or just plain burnt out I become a little unstable and start over analyzing my condition...What changed? Why do I feel this way? How can I fix it? When should I work out again... Where is my structure??? The key to learning and growing is, ask the right questions. I try to ask myself and the people directly involved with my program the right questions to problem solve quickly. I am not afraid of change, in fact I invite change, because it is in my opinion, a sign of growth. I am though, apposed to fluxuations in my program due to intrinsic factors I seek but cannot control. I am currently pleased with way in which I am building upon an already proven program and am eager to test my progress.

100 miles later I find myself standing at the edge of a tram way with a beautiful girl on a star lit night. Yes! a tram way, Casablanca is a house and it is enormous, it has it's own tram that will carry you up the side of it's cascading hill. At the top is a veranda which peaks the Cross Creek valley. This is where Lauren and I spent the evening with some good people listening to good music. Tonight was the release party for the band Big Dume. Drinks and horderves flowed abundantly as we made small talk with strangers and exchanged warm hugs with old friends. Another great day in the books. I absorb these moments and relish in the smiles because you never know what's down the road another 100 miles.

7-27-2005

Just when you think you've got a handle on things, you slip in some water lose your balance and roll your ankle with an already hurt knee. Yeah! That's what I did this afternoon in the parking lot of the gym. When it rains, it pours, right? No worries though, I can handle productive injuries. Knowing I'm injured because of an activity sits alright with me. It's the out of the blue symptoms that create a sense of worry and frustration. These types of situations only fuel my desire to work harder on and off the bike. I'm confident in my conditioning and the work up to this point, but, I know how quickly my body resorts back to a state of stillness if not worked continuously. I will actively rest my knee and ankle doing as much as these injuries allow, trying to maintain my level of fitness so when I return to the pedals of the bike, I feel as though I never missed a beat.

7-28-2005

Well...it does! Sometimes it seems to be all at once. What a day... I wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed ready to rock, but instead, a series of unfortunate events rocks me. A mild workout routine with Taylor this morning had me feeling pretty good. I executed everything from a seated position to limit weight bearing on my sore leg. My knee is stable in the brace I'm wearing and my ankle was tightly wrapped. We decided it would a good idea to get an X-ray of my knee and ankle to know the extent of the injuries. While enroute to the hospital; a place I was not looking forward to going, my Jeep breaks down on the side of the road. This is the third time in two weeks the Jeep has done this...we just picked it up from the dealership last night for this problem...a problem they apparently did "Not" fix. So hanging out in the heat on the side of the highway wasn't much fun, to say least. Eventually I got my X-rays after the usual two hour wait, only to find out I have a slight evulsion fracture on the lateral side of my ankle and need to remain in a splint, elevated, with ice for up to 5 days until the doctor re-evaluates. I know this journal entry probably sounds like I'm whining about my dramatic day; at least it does to me as I'm writing it. I'm just telling you like it is, it's actually kind of funny, I'm finding allot of humor in all that has unfolded in the last few hours. The timing is incredible, I was actually supposed to leave town this afternoon for the weekend, plans change...obviously! These types of events really open my eyes, instead of becoming upset by the circumstances I sort of laugh and think how lucky I am to have avoided something worse. In the end, this day has been a blessing in disguise, an opportunity to properly heal and plan for an up coming bike race in San Francisco next month, hopefully I'll be ready....as long as the roller coaster ride I'm on stays steady.

I was alittle bored today laying around with my foot propped up. After watching a couple movies, a documentary and Oprah I was fed up with TV, so I made my way to the garage; my favorite place in the house besides my shower. I found Toots pedaling away on her stationary bicycle sweatin and singing along to Fleetwood Mac. Toots is awesome, I truly would not be where I am today without her love and support. I am so lucky to have her as my mother, my friend, a mentor and now my cycling teammate. Toots ROCKS! While Toots was sweatin to the oldies, I figured I'd get my heart pumping a bit by cranking my arm cycle ogometer and blaze around my street in my wheelchair. I literally have not used my chair in at least a year. I am soooo thankful I can say that! and hope others will soon be able to say the same. Pushing around tonight had me reflecting on the thousands of hours I've spent rehabilitating my body and brought myself to one question; Am I satisfied? Yes and no!  Yes, I am satisfied with my efforts up to this point and No, because I know I can do a whole lot more!   ...and No!  I'm not really going that fast.

I am incredibly honored to know this website instills hope and inspiration to my fellow friend. By sharing with you my journey, I realize our connectedness through experience and derive great inspiration through individual stories of perseverance. Today I spoke on the phone with a young guy named Kyle. Kyle is a recovering quadriplegic from West Virginia. He and I spoke candidly about our injuries, inquiring the process that has brought us to our current state. I thoroughly enjoyed learning about Kyle's "CAN DO" spirit and the strength he embodies. We made a deal that he is going to meet me along the way on our cross country bike tour and crank out some miles along side us...I look forward to that day! You can do it Kyle!  Kyle is one of many emails and phone calls I receive on a weekly basis, seeking insight about my recovery. I graciously thank everyone who contacts me because I sincerely believe we can help each other more if we work together. I have no magic formula to share, only the work I've done. I absorb inspiration from the people and stories around me, hoping together, hand in hand we create change for ourselves and our world.

Daniel G. Baker the II...Does that make me the III? My first name is Daniel, but as you all know I go by Aaron. Whatever? My dad Dan, Danny, Dano, Dan the man, or sometimes Danimal is the greatest father and friend a boy could ask for. For as long as I can remember my dad has always been a solid fixture of support, albeit moral, physical and yes financial, how do you think I got to all those amateur motocross races as a kid? Dirt bikes didn't grow on trees. Whatever my interest my dad took the same, except when I got my tongue pierced; he was pissed!!! My point is, I love my dad and cherish the relationship we have. I often wish we lived closer than 375 miles apart, he, living in Sacramento and I'm living here in Los Angeles makes for infrequent visits. When we do spend time together though, I am transported back to days of youth where father and son make a team no fish can fool, no racetrack can conquer and no other lakeside BBQing beer drinker can match! My dad and I have had many great times together and with each new adventure our bond grows stronger. The tide has changed a bit though, for all the years Dano has spent standing at my side with his supporting hand at my back, I am now at his side, encouraging and supporting him as he climbs the ranks of the professional Dart Throwing league...a pastime he enjoys tremendously. It's fun to stand back and watch our relationship grow full circle and to know we've got each others backs no matter what.